Friday, October 31, 2008
Who dat
What is everyone being for Halloween? I am being a corpse bride. E is being a corpse ring bearer. Eric is being..well its scary thats all I know. Blood pumps through his skeleton chest.
Thursday, October 30, 2008
Halloween Eve Eve
Halloween was a big no-no in my house growing up. I was told that it was a day to celebrate the devil and that babies and cats were sacrificed to Satan on that day so we couldn't go trick or treating lest we give the devil his Holiday. I have never went trick or treating save on time when I was 13 and went with my aunt to help with my cousins(who got to celebrate).
I remember the school parties and how everyone was dressed up in the cute costumes and how my mother insisted that I be removed from the classroom so that I don't get evil stink on me. There was one teacher that I could tell felt sorry for me and she snuck me a popcorn ball when I was in second grade. That was the best treat I have had to this day.
As I got older I would get invited to parties and have to make up some lame excuse as to why I would not be attending. Everyone know the reason but I liked to pretend and my buddies let me.
At 14 years old they had turned the old prison in our town into a MASSIVE haunted house. It was 4 stories of spook. Of course all my friends were going and kept raving about how great it was going to be. Well, our church (that was pastored by my grandfather) sat right across the street from the horror goldmine. We hatched a brilliant plan for me to sneak away from the church activities and run through to haunted house, then return before anyone ever missed.
We spend weeks planning and I knew it had to be just the right moment. I waited all night. My best friend came to the church with me that night and was planning to help me escape.
Darkness had just fell and everyone was ushered into the church to say a prayer for all the lost souls over at the spook house and I sat on the back row calculating exactly how long it would take to get there and back. I figured 30 minutes. But wait, what if the line was long. Better make that 45 minutes.
My bff was anxious. "Come on". "Lets just go now you wont get caught I swear".
I wanted to listen to her but she said that exact same thing when we thought it would be funny smoke cigarettes in the little storage room at the high school. And the time we left school and walked to the Piggly Wiggly and my grandmother just happened to be doing her shopping. There were many, many times that I had heard those words.
I got up and went outside. I could see my destination. It was right across the street. Just a brief sprint and I would be there. I knew she wanted to go and our whole teenage hoodlum posse was waiting on me. I knew this was it. Now or Never.
I couldn't do it. Fear. Shame that maybe it was wrong. More fear. Embarrassment. Anger.
I finally got to go to my first spook spectacular at 25.
My son will NEVER know what it feels like to miss out on being a kid.
I remember the school parties and how everyone was dressed up in the cute costumes and how my mother insisted that I be removed from the classroom so that I don't get evil stink on me. There was one teacher that I could tell felt sorry for me and she snuck me a popcorn ball when I was in second grade. That was the best treat I have had to this day.
As I got older I would get invited to parties and have to make up some lame excuse as to why I would not be attending. Everyone know the reason but I liked to pretend and my buddies let me.
At 14 years old they had turned the old prison in our town into a MASSIVE haunted house. It was 4 stories of spook. Of course all my friends were going and kept raving about how great it was going to be. Well, our church (that was pastored by my grandfather) sat right across the street from the horror goldmine. We hatched a brilliant plan for me to sneak away from the church activities and run through to haunted house, then return before anyone ever missed.
We spend weeks planning and I knew it had to be just the right moment. I waited all night. My best friend came to the church with me that night and was planning to help me escape.
Darkness had just fell and everyone was ushered into the church to say a prayer for all the lost souls over at the spook house and I sat on the back row calculating exactly how long it would take to get there and back. I figured 30 minutes. But wait, what if the line was long. Better make that 45 minutes.
My bff was anxious. "Come on". "Lets just go now you wont get caught I swear".
I wanted to listen to her but she said that exact same thing when we thought it would be funny smoke cigarettes in the little storage room at the high school. And the time we left school and walked to the Piggly Wiggly and my grandmother just happened to be doing her shopping. There were many, many times that I had heard those words.
I got up and went outside. I could see my destination. It was right across the street. Just a brief sprint and I would be there. I knew she wanted to go and our whole teenage hoodlum posse was waiting on me. I knew this was it. Now or Never.
I couldn't do it. Fear. Shame that maybe it was wrong. More fear. Embarrassment. Anger.
I finally got to go to my first spook spectacular at 25.
My son will NEVER know what it feels like to miss out on being a kid.
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
Do not laugh. I can be deep
After great pain, a formal feeling comes-
The Nerves sit ceremonious, like Tombs-
The stiff Heart questions was it He, That bore
And Yesterday, or Centuries before?
The Feet, mechanical, go round-
Of Ground, or Air, or Ought-
A wooden way
Regardless grown,
A Quartz contentment, like a stone-
This is the Hour of Lead-
Remembered, if outlived,
As Freezing persons, recollect the Snow-
First-Chill-the Stupor-then the letting go-
Emily Dickenson
Yes I am using you for an essay assignment. My project is to relate a poem to my daily life.
You may have noticed that I changed my profile a bit. I stated that (in)fertility doesn't define who I am. I can honestly say that I feel that way now.
This poem speaks to me. In a morbid freaky way..
I have accepted. I have let go.
The Nerves sit ceremonious, like Tombs-
The stiff Heart questions was it He, That bore
And Yesterday, or Centuries before?
The Feet, mechanical, go round-
Of Ground, or Air, or Ought-
A wooden way
Regardless grown,
A Quartz contentment, like a stone-
This is the Hour of Lead-
Remembered, if outlived,
As Freezing persons, recollect the Snow-
First-Chill-the Stupor-then the letting go-
Emily Dickenson
Yes I am using you for an essay assignment. My project is to relate a poem to my daily life.
You may have noticed that I changed my profile a bit. I stated that (in)fertility doesn't define who I am. I can honestly say that I feel that way now.
This poem speaks to me. In a morbid freaky way..
I have accepted. I have let go.
Friday, October 24, 2008
One Word
Hello out there in bloggy land. I am sorry I have been neglecting my blog but, as I stated in a previous post, I have discovered google reader and I am most addicted now to discovering everyone's great blogs. I have been uninspired lately to write about my going ons.
Did you know there are other people out there that blog for other reasons than babies? Who knew.
Kate tagged my for a meme so I am thinking maybe this will bet my creative juices flowing a little better. Thank you Kate!
I have to answer in one word answers to the following questions:
1. Where is your cell phone? Purse
2. Where is your significant other? Bed
3. Your hair color? rooty :o
4. Your mother? Horny
5. Your father? clueless
6. Your favorite thing? Love
7. Your dream last night? Full
8. Your dream/goal? uninspired
9. The room you’re in? messy
10. Your hobby? fishing
11. Your fear? tornadoes
12. Where do you want to be in six years? Here
13. Where were you last night? Home
14. What you’re not? organized
15. One of your wish list items? PAINT
16. Where you grew up? East Texas
17. The last thing you did? Flatter
18. What are you wearing? Jean
19. Your T.V.? Necessity
20. Your pets? Punks
21. Your computer? Evil
22. Your mood? bored
23. Missing someone? Yes
24. Your car? Dirty
25. Something you’re not wearing? Watch
26. Favorite store? CVS
27. Your Summer? Great
28. Love someone? Family
29. Your favorite color? Red
30. When is the last time you laughed? yesterday
31. Last time you cried? Flo
And now I must tag seven of you. I am not really sure I have 7 readers and I don't want to loose anymore by tagging the same people over and over. Sooo. If you feel the need then by all means, Do the Damn Thang
Did you know there are other people out there that blog for other reasons than babies? Who knew.
Kate tagged my for a meme so I am thinking maybe this will bet my creative juices flowing a little better. Thank you Kate!
I have to answer in one word answers to the following questions:
1. Where is your cell phone? Purse
2. Where is your significant other? Bed
3. Your hair color? rooty :o
4. Your mother? Horny
5. Your father? clueless
6. Your favorite thing? Love
7. Your dream last night? Full
8. Your dream/goal? uninspired
9. The room you’re in? messy
10. Your hobby? fishing
11. Your fear? tornadoes
12. Where do you want to be in six years? Here
13. Where were you last night? Home
14. What you’re not? organized
15. One of your wish list items? PAINT
16. Where you grew up? East Texas
17. The last thing you did? Flatter
18. What are you wearing? Jean
19. Your T.V.? Necessity
20. Your pets? Punks
21. Your computer? Evil
22. Your mood? bored
23. Missing someone? Yes
24. Your car? Dirty
25. Something you’re not wearing? Watch
26. Favorite store? CVS
27. Your Summer? Great
28. Love someone? Family
29. Your favorite color? Red
30. When is the last time you laughed? yesterday
31. Last time you cried? Flo
And now I must tag seven of you. I am not really sure I have 7 readers and I don't want to loose anymore by tagging the same people over and over. Sooo. If you feel the need then by all means, Do the Damn Thang
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
My Promise
Two years ago today I made this promise to my best friend:
I, Marie, take you, Eric, to be my husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do us part.
The security that these words give to me is amazing.
I love you more than I can ever express. May we always bend so that we do not break.
Happy Anniversary baby.
I, Marie, take you, Eric, to be my husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do us part.
The security that these words give to me is amazing.
I love you more than I can ever express. May we always bend so that we do not break.
Happy Anniversary baby.
Thursday, October 9, 2008
Good Day
I just finished my paper. It is going to be a hella long day.
Can I just say I am in love with google reader? I don't know why I waited so long to use it. If you are not using you are wasting a ton of time. Also for those who thought I was a stalker, I am sorry. I am just a little on the lazy side and it was easier to click on everybody then move you over. But, it was slow at work today so it is done.
My eyes are bleary and I am having trouble seeing so I am going to close my eyes for a couple of hours.
Eric, how in the world do you do this!!!?
Can I just say I am in love with google reader? I don't know why I waited so long to use it. If you are not using you are wasting a ton of time. Also for those who thought I was a stalker, I am sorry. I am just a little on the lazy side and it was easier to click on everybody then move you over. But, it was slow at work today so it is done.
My eyes are bleary and I am having trouble seeing so I am going to close my eyes for a couple of hours.
Eric, how in the world do you do this!!!?
Wednesday, October 8, 2008
Enema...Check!
Well, I have had so much to post about and didn't, I am now backed up! The only way to handle this kind of post is just unclog. It may get messy but I gotta get it all out.
School is kicking my ass. I only take one class so those of you who have a full load can tell me to suck it if you want. But guys, school and work together are HARD. I have a research paper that was due 2 hours ago and instead of going to class I stayed home so that I could have in the professors inbox by 12am.
I then decided to go to Wal-Mart and give them a $100 before coming home. What made me think that would relax me? I have no clue. I haven't shopped in about 3 weeks and we were on the last roll of butt paper so it was necessary. I also had to get bones for Resfusia(btw I am not sure I like my dogs bloggie name. It was funny then not so much now) because she decided to eat my CELL PHONE again.
The silver lining about the cell phone is I will probably switch carries not because Sprint, the giant corporate douche bag, sucks a little of my soul every time I have to call them. I actually can get an outstanding deal with AT&T and Eric can get his rocks off on a new Blackberry and I can have a simple, CHEAP, cell that will make calls and text. Even though I am sad the new great phone died, I really didn't use the features anyway.
I also had to get supplies for E and I to go camping this weekend. We are going on a Mom and Me camp out were we get to put up a tent and hike through the woods and pick up frogs and stuff. Its fun..really.
In case anyone is worried about my emotional state the head snooty mom will not be there so I am safe. Speaking of.....Snooty mom gave me a compliment today as she thought I held a splendid event for our children. I was awesome. In fact, today I had lunch with E and as I walked through the cafeteria, I got lots of hugs from the little boys that were there. They all wanted to sit with E and I at the parent table. He was proud and even gave me a big hug when I left. I definitely proved myself with the kids so I think the parents will come around.
I have wanted to post but everything was dreary and sad. I won't go into possible titles but they were very dark and I figured I would wait till it passed. You know what? It did.
Ok, so now I have 2 hours 45 minutes to do a research paper that is not even started. Anyone know anything on Andre Dubus?? If you do feel free to email. I will be here nursing a cup of coffee that may have a little liquor in it.
School is kicking my ass. I only take one class so those of you who have a full load can tell me to suck it if you want. But guys, school and work together are HARD. I have a research paper that was due 2 hours ago and instead of going to class I stayed home so that I could have in the professors inbox by 12am.
I then decided to go to Wal-Mart and give them a $100 before coming home. What made me think that would relax me? I have no clue. I haven't shopped in about 3 weeks and we were on the last roll of butt paper so it was necessary. I also had to get bones for Resfusia(btw I am not sure I like my dogs bloggie name. It was funny then not so much now) because she decided to eat my CELL PHONE again.
The silver lining about the cell phone is I will probably switch carries not because Sprint, the giant corporate douche bag, sucks a little of my soul every time I have to call them. I actually can get an outstanding deal with AT&T and Eric can get his rocks off on a new Blackberry and I can have a simple, CHEAP, cell that will make calls and text. Even though I am sad the new great phone died, I really didn't use the features anyway.
I also had to get supplies for E and I to go camping this weekend. We are going on a Mom and Me camp out were we get to put up a tent and hike through the woods and pick up frogs and stuff. Its fun..really.
In case anyone is worried about my emotional state the head snooty mom will not be there so I am safe. Speaking of.....Snooty mom gave me a compliment today as she thought I held a splendid event for our children. I was awesome. In fact, today I had lunch with E and as I walked through the cafeteria, I got lots of hugs from the little boys that were there. They all wanted to sit with E and I at the parent table. He was proud and even gave me a big hug when I left. I definitely proved myself with the kids so I think the parents will come around.
I have wanted to post but everything was dreary and sad. I won't go into possible titles but they were very dark and I figured I would wait till it passed. You know what? It did.
Ok, so now I have 2 hours 45 minutes to do a research paper that is not even started. Anyone know anything on Andre Dubus?? If you do feel free to email. I will be here nursing a cup of coffee that may have a little liquor in it.
Thursday, October 2, 2008
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
Hot Thoughts
Eric,
What a night we had last night!
As we sat there in the dim light.
Our eyes locked.
That sexy brooding look you get with that sexy twitching along your jaw line.
I know you wanted it.
You know I wanted it.
We felt as if we were the only people in the room.
With the same goal.
The same hot thoughts.
We were both thinking???
I wish this stupid snooty mom would shut up so we can finish this meeting. Yeah you know you wanted it too.
*btw, all of you are pure perverts!!!
What a night we had last night!
As we sat there in the dim light.
Our eyes locked.
That sexy brooding look you get with that sexy twitching along your jaw line.
I know you wanted it.
You know I wanted it.
We felt as if we were the only people in the room.
With the same goal.
The same hot thoughts.
We were both thinking???
I wish this stupid snooty mom would shut up so we can finish this meeting. Yeah you know you wanted it too.
*btw, all of you are pure perverts!!!
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