Friday, February 27, 2009

Who's your sucky blogger

So, raise your hand if you have had a sick child this week and totally fell short on your ICLW responsibilities.

Marie: Me, Me, Me!!!!

I am sorry I do hope to get back into the swing of things.

This virus that E has will not die. He will get better and instantly have a 101 fever all over again. He has missed 3 days of school and this is the first time he has missed all year. He is never sick and so when he is I tend to go overboard. You name the symptom and he has had it. I have used a whole can of Oust, hoping to kill all the germs I can, but I feel a good cleaning is in order..joy.

I have been reading when I can and commenting and I am probably not that far behind but I feel that my blog is suffering.

eh, I have never been an over achiever so I guess you have to take what you get.

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

And so it begins

“Well, I used to tell my husband that we could be professional baby makers. I wasn’t sick a day. I wore my pregnancies beautifully and most people didn’t even know I was with child until about 7 months. I had more energy than usual and my house never looked better. I just don’t know what it would feel like to have morning sickness or pains! I guess some people just handle it better than others.”


Bite me, grandma!

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

The Hunger

I would like to dedicate this post to food and crazy dreams. I don't know if I have forgotten the weird pregnancy stuff or if this child is completely different from E. I can't eat meat. Well, I can't eat anything I can picture raw. I can eat Hot dogs, pepperoni, tuna and shrimp. The rest of what I consume is fruit and cheese. Healthy right? I haven't had strong cravings only strong adversions. I wan't the cravings! I want to make Eric drive the BFE to get me something I can't live without but sadly, I can only name the things I can't eat. I am hungry ALL THE TIME. I have been wanting chicken and dumplings and my father in law is going to fix some today and I am going to try to eat them so wish me luck!

I would also like to comment on my crazy ass dreams!

Last night was the first night that I have actually dreamed about the baby. My dreams post last nights included: Them smoke monster in Lost, Syid in Lost and going to the middle east and shopping in a mall with my grandma.

Last night I dreamed that the baby came early and we were in no way prepared. The baby's room was not done so I decided to make him a home in my closet that just got cleaned yesterday. We have no crib or bassinet so Eric fashioned a bed out of a indoor basketball goal complete with a lighted scoreboard. It was a boy and he could talk so I kept apoligizing to him about not being prepared and he was all "Mom, its cool...REALY." I let E hold him and before I knew it he had laid him down and forgot where he put him.

That happened THREE TIMES.

We finally realized that we would just wait until he cried and then we could find him.

It never occured to me to stop letting him have the baby.

I am questioning my parenting skills right now.

I am also hungry!

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Nadya

I cried when I saw this. I haven't been following this story due to the fact that I want to do bodily harm to all parties involved. I think about what we have gone through, which is a drop in the bucket of what some of my dear internet friends have gone through to concieve, and It physically hurts to see this irresponsibility. I wonder what will happen to these sweet babies.

The Dr. that did this? You are one sick fuck!

Friday, February 6, 2009

Wow

Holy Crap! Check out my ticker. That might be a little inaccurate at least my dr seems to think I am not that far along but I am going to use my judgement until I know something else.

Thursday, February 5, 2009

Dirty Dream

Last night a dreamed(dreamt?)that I gave birth to a cat.

Have you ever tried to burp a cat?

It's not easy!

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

The Beginning

I am not very detail oriented. I am bad about leaving out details and think faster than I type of talk. It occured to me that I haven't really gave many details about finding out and such so today I am going to tell my conception story.

November was an extremely hard month for us. We had some things going on financially that had to be taken care of. We were fighting emotional battles within ourselves and estranged family and it was taking a toll on our relationship. I think we all know that when you throw TTC in the mix of that, then you have a recipe for disaster.

I was already late for my October period and was starting to get a little crazy. I had really worked myself up and was convinced that the pregnancy test were wrong and that I was indeed pregnant. When I did start I was devestated, again, and bitchy, again, and depressed, again. I was a treat.

Lather, rinse, & repeat for December as my november period was off from being late in October and didn't come until middle of december. Eric and I were having so much trouble that I wouldn't even fill out the RE paperwork because I just couldn't see it. I knew that filling out that paperwork was it and if we did commit to a medicated cycle the odds of it working, in my mind, were super slim.

I decided to take a trip and get away to see my best friend. I have never traveled anywhere alone and she works at a ski resort and we would have free access to some of the best skiing in Colorado so I was stoked about getting away and seeing her.

We had decided to take a complete break in december. No charting, temping, test taking, talking about a baby, no timed sex. I was so excited about the trip I don't even remember when my period was. I do know that I drank wine like it was my second job. We enjoyed the holidays and enjoyed New Years.

Eric's birthday was January 14th and we were having a little cookout for him and thinking that I was supposed to start my period soon, I decided to take a test. I didn't expect anything but a negative and honestly knew that I would not be that sad when I saw it. I just didn't want to miss the opportunity of giving my husband a positive for his birthday.

Well the test popped up positive IMMEDIATELY.

I took 1 more on the way home...in a gas station. (Don't judge me)

I would love for this part to be a sweet way that I wrapped up the stick and gave it to him with all the other presents. I did intend to do it that way. However, what really happened is this.

I burst through the door.

He was playing Grand Theft Auto iv.

I shoved the stick in his face and said, "look, you are going to be a dad".

Blink

Blink

"What?"

"Your lying"

"That's fake"

I showed him both tests and had another test ready for when I had to pee again.

Here is the part of the story where I would like to tell you that he jumped up and down and swept me in his arms and we danced in the kitchen. Here is what really happened.

He went to the garage.

I followed him in.

He had tears in his eyes.

He saw me looking at him.

"You better not be joking"

Then we hugged and laughed and all that good stuff.

After dinner we took the test together. I peed in a cup and he dipped the test and we got another positive.

E was ecstatic.

We told our parents that night. And pretty much everyone else knew the next day.

Now as for my due date, I don't have a confirmed one yet. I think I am about 7 weeks. My HCG test showed high like 7-12 weeks when I should have been 5 weeks so that was a little confusing. My Dr said you can't use that to calculate how far along you are.

The ultrasound maching showed my sach to be measuring 5 1/2 weeks last Monday and yesterday he didn't really tell me. Since I don't know the exact day of my last period I may not have a calculated due date until March 2nd when I go back to the DR.

We live in such a small town and have 3 OB Drs. Apparently the sonogram machine isn't the best and that is why we could barely see the heart beat. My Dr. doesn't do the vaginal ultrasound and I didn't hear the heart beat but I did see if flashing.

It has been 8 years since I have done this so I am open to any and all assvice. Also I am looking for the best ticker and I will just use my calculations until next month. But that is where we are so far.

Monday, February 2, 2009

Thump, Thump, Thump

We have a beautiful heartbeat.

Tick, Tick, Tick

I have one hour until I leave for my ultrasound and the clock seems to be frozen on 1:14.

To be fair to all the google searches that we bloggers make fun of, I thought that I would comprise a list of my own personal google searches this week. Some were googled by me and others by Eric while I was laying in bed in tears. I will let you guess the ones he had the pleasure of googleing.

1. 5 ½ weeks and we didn’t see a heart beat?
2. Orgasm and Miscarriage?
3. Really high HCG levels but no heart beat
4. Brownish discharge in 6th week of pregnancy?
5. Can I use face wash with sylic acid while pregnant? (still not sure)
6. Molar Pregnancy
7. Signs you are having twins
8. 6 weeks pregnant and extremely hungry
9. due date calculator
10. 7 weeks pregnant and so very hungry
11. 7 weeks pregnant and still hungry as I am eating is this normal.
12. am I having twins quiz
13. Pregnant belly shots at 6 weeks (for comparison as I feel that my stomach is HUGE already and I am not even playing.

So there you have my humbling list. I am sure there were more but I can’t remember now.

I am serious about the hunger. Has anyone else experienced this? I am eating something small and healthy every 2-3 hours. Sometimes I think its nausea but it always get better after I eat something. I have never had hunger pains until now and I swear they are real and they suck.

Well I killed 15 minutes so now I will go eat string cheese.

I will check back with good news…